‘The Theory of Alexis’ and it’s Five Key elements explained

Thanks to DeviantArt for this Graphic

Thanks to DeviantArt for this Graphic

This week’s post will be inverted. First the Honourable Mentions, then the Stellar Moments and finally the Star Man. And let us not kid ourselves here we all know who that is.

Honourable Mentions:

Olivier Giroud: He made himself a possible target in the box every time there was one needed and his run ahead of Ozil was the reason we got to see Ozil celebrating a headed goal instead of an Ozil spread eagled on the pitch having been flattened by two defenders. He is on a good run and should remain so for the foreseeable future. When Walcott returns I honestly hope Wenger keeps going with the Plan A-Plan B system. And Giroud should be Plan A at the start, he’s earned it.

A rare header

A rare header

Mesut Ozil: Mesut Ozil had a typically stellar game. He was everywhere. Literally everywhere. In fact, by average position on the pitch during open play he was leading our frontline! I don’t know if anybody noticed this but I can’t seem to find the page where I saw it and I distinctly remember making a note of it to put it into the piece. So if anybody does find the site do share it with me on Twitter (@ArSensei_Sohum). Besides the goal Mesut had a pass completion of 89% and created 4 chances. I think we’re witnessing a break out season here. Stay tuned.

Mathieu Flamini: The billionaire to be has an unenviable job on his hands as he attempts to cover for the Coq. His experience shown through at the Emirates on Tuesday with an all-encompassing display which highlighted the fact that experience means better positioning in general. He was never too eager to get into attack and once he won the ball he either stepped away or passed it safe. He also provided pressure on the ball for the opposition brilliantly and all that shows with his stats. He completed 95% of his passes having started the game with only 3 misplaced passes. He even managed to create one chance and that is more than we expect.

Bravo Flame

Bravo Flame

Santi Cazorla: After a lacklustre display against West Brom and that penalty slip, we all needed our little magician to conjure some tricks. And he certainly did. With 7 successful dribbles and 90% passes completed Cazorla was back at his best. While we struggle without Coquelin, Cazorla’s contribution is vital and it was good to see him back to his level after a hard day.

Stellar Moments:

Alexis is Jesus: Well what can I say. Read on after you’ve had a look at this fantastic post from @theEpicGooner.  The man is James Bond in Chile and Jesus in Britain. What a chap. Such level of ball control reminds me of Dennis Bergkamp and his unnerving skills with the ball. Alexis is not at that stage yet and I hope he wins loads of trophies with us because this man deserves to be immortalised in some club’s memory. Barcelona cast him away when they got a better player, and I daresay we are not going to ever get another player like this one so we must be the people who immortalize him. That moment also reaffirmed my beliefs about Alexis, he really plays as if he were in his own backyard. That is not a receive which anybody in their right mind would attempt!

Ozil calling for ball prior to Goal: The way in which Mesut Ozil was blasting forward at every attempt just goes on to show the level he is playing at these days. He did not do this from the start of the season mind you so it is almost like he decided to shore up the season before trying to go for glory himself. Class. When he made the run, and Giroud made the fake one ahead of him- I suspected foul play. Ozil called for the ball and Ollie didn’t. I thought it was some sort of trick. Maybe Zagreb thought so too because they were fooled and we were ahead. All in a day’s work for Mesut Ozil.


For a few weeks now a theory has been germinating in my mind. Quite an unspectacular one when we look at the great theories in our world. String Theory, Theory of relativity, Theory of Everything (Loved the movie)- these are the truly great theories, the ones you need a deluge of degrees to comprehend. Mine is unassumingly simple and deceptively accurate. Of course I do not say it is original and that nobody else has the same idea. In fact, the beauty of my theory is that every Arsenal supporter has already accepted it as true whether they know it or not. It goes somewhat like this:

The Theory of Alexis states that the goals scored and/or assisted by Alexis Sanchez will be a function of the amount of sprints he makes per game, and will increase over time irrespective of bodily factors such as fatigue and weakness.

Furthermore the postulates of the Theory of Alexis states that:

i)Alexis will not be rested when he does not want to be rested.

ii)Alexis never wants to be rested.

iii)His form follows the graph exactly of the damage caused by a tidal wave approaching a beach. The greater number of games he plays, the greater the height of the wave will be and the harder it will strike causing proportionately greater damage.

iv) The greater the number of games he plays the greater will be the distance of the wave from the sea, similarly the speed will increase and so will the casualties when it strikes.

iv)The duration of the streak will be analogous to the wave receding back to sea, as long as the water is on land he will be in form. This is a continuous process and will restart with every new season.

You are the man Sohum - Great Theory (thanks to Telegraph inage)

You are the man Sohum – Great Theory (thanks to Telegraph inage)

Truth be told I came up with this last season, but after the Zagreb game I was sure. This is it people. You will thank me later. May the Arsenal fans of the future know me as the origin of The Theory of Alexis.

It was supposed to be a Star Man piece on him when I began this blog. However such is the delight that Sanchez brings to us, it is very rare that anything overwhelms his output. And that is proof of the skill of the other titan in our ranks, Mesut Ozil who has been grabbing all the Star Man inches in the past few weeks. There is very little left to say more about Mesut at this point so I am glad Sanchez did what he did yesterday.

Without a doubt Sanchez has been in stellar touch in the Champions League this term because despite all our struggles he has been amongst the goals, whether scoring or providing. He has the highest assists tally in the competition when last checked as well as the greatest number of completed take-ons with 32 going as of now after the match. What is amazing about that number is the positioning of his dribbles, he no longer tries to pass an entire defence from the back. He attempted 2 dribbles in the penalty box out of which one was the one where he scored past their keeper. He has 66 touches the majority of which were under in an area where a single successful dribble would put him through on goal. He has 4 shots which produced 2 goals and one was blocked. His Whoscored.com rating of 9.57 is the highest I have seen him achieve and that is because of the sheer effort he has put in.

What we all don’t see is that Sanchez does not have much of the ball. Taking the keeper out of the equation considering negligible time in his hands, the ball may spend an average of 10% of team possession with each player with a slight advantage for the midfielders where it may stay more. However what is very apparent is that Sanchez uses his meagre 3.6% possession very well. To put that into perspective-the opposing goalkeeper has the same amount of possession. He has possession same as that of a goalkeeper and he delivers 2 goals and one sublime assist for my moment of the season till now. I was shouting in pure ecstasy when Ozil headed the ball in with a dive. There is no doubt Ozil heading a ball into goal is a sight I did not expect to see. And that happened because of Alexis’s assist and Giroud’s smart run. Giroud charged away at the front post dragging off two defenders with him and leaving Ozil free to head in with aplomb. Completing 32 out of 38 attempted passes is by no means an easy feat especially with his levels of exhaustion.

Which brings me back to the Theory and my prediction in the preview about him being the decider. It is the first time I got a prediction of the sort so, hey that’s some I owe Sanchez! Arsene Wenger has finally admitted that the truth is breaks make Alexis tired. This confirms my suspicions and proves the theory. Alexis is a tidal wave, he is searching for land to strike and he has just found some. The Land of Stellar Form. He is going to go on as long as the streak lasts him, before the water goes back and he starts to search for land again. Let Giroud pick up the gauntlet, let Aaron strike some goals and Walcott too. I don’t mind if Alexis drops off at Christmas after the big game. I pray that the others pick up for him at that time because he is going to rise when the stage calls for it.

Let Alexis thirst for the Land of Form as we thirst for our first League title in more than a decade and he will strike the opposition with the force of Poseidon’s oceans. For now let us enjoy his ravaging of our low level opposition in the next few weeks.

And please do remember when you tell your grandchildren, The Theory of Alexis was proposed by Sohum Sen. To Norwich we go now. Come On You Gunners.

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