And the Curse of the Arsenal Number 9 Continues…. The Far Side is Back

 

Happy Australia Day GunnersTown. (A couple of days late)

A lot has happened during my 7 week sabbatical around the world.

 

I got to see the sunset in Phuket

 

Far Side 1

 

I got to spend Boxing Day at church, for the first time in 6 years,

Farside 2

 

I got introduced to the Tibetan Arsenals Supporters club,

Farside 3

 

And I got my kicks on Route 66.

 

Farside 4

Szcz got caught fagging in the showers

 

Farside 5

Le Coq became the right implement, in the right hole,

 

Farside 6

Santi got his grove back

 

And the curse of the number 9 continues…..

 

I truly believed that Ha Ha Poldi would be the wizard that banished this particular curse back the the nether regions of hades where it belongs but alas it wasn’t to be & The Arsenal are still under its wicked spell.

 

No true bearer of the 9 sine Smudger

No true bearer of the 9 since Smudger

 

Ever since Smudger adorned the shirt in the early 90’s, many have tried to undertake the duties meeting the job specifications, but none have really succeeded or stuck around long enough to see the job through:

First to try was Paul Merson. With Bergkamp’s arrival in ‘95, Merse was allocated the no. 9 shirt. What followed was a dip in form & a well documented spiral into drink, drugs & gambling & so the curse began.

 

Then came Nicholas Anelka.  The precocious teenager plucked from PSG for a mere £500,000. Le Sulk lasted 2 seasons in the role, before starting the trend of ‘following the dough’ & swanned off to Real Madrid for the tidy sum of £22.5m

 

David Suker, in his prime a world class player, but when he signed for the Arsenal, the sun was setting on his career & with 8 goals in 22 games, he was eventually shipped to East London to see out his retirement.

 

‘The Fox in the Box’ was signed from Everton for £8m, & was was supposed to be the answer to our prayers. In 3 seasons, he dramatically failed to live up to the expectations & was last seen in plying his trade for Newcastle (Australia) as the clubs ‘Marquee Player’?

 

 

Jose Antonio Reyes them came & went. Another big money signing (£10m) attempt to break the curse came & went. Jose stared with promise, but home sickness & the Neville brothers put paid to any chance of him claiming the shirt as his own & he jumped ship back to Spain at the earliest opportunity.

 

Julio ‘The Beast’ Baptista came with a big reputation & with an outstanding display against Liverpool in the Carling Cup, looked like he might be up to the job. But alas, it was soon realised that his bark was worse than his bite & in 2007 he was shipped off to Roma.

An instant hit with the fans, Eduardo came the closest to filling Smudger’s boots. That was up until that fateful day in February 2008 when his horrific leg break caused his & Arsenals season to crumble. Upon his return he was never the same player & he too was sold onto pastures new.

The least said about Ju-Young Park the better.  Basically a PR stunt that went drastically wrong. Signed in a panic, never up to the job, really not worthy of the number & demoted to number 30 the following  season. I do hope shirts sales in Korea went up.

And then there was Ha Ha Poldi. Wenger tried an alternate cure to shake the disease. ‘Give the Number 9 to a Number 10′. As we all know, Lukas has the capability to play anywhere across the frontline, can score howitzers for fun & obviously loves(d) the club.  But for some reason,  Arsene just didn’t think that was enough & after 2 1/2 years, Inter are now singing, ‘Don’t ya wish your striker was Po-Dol-Ski, Don’t ya’ !!!!

Arsene is now left with a choice, does he convince Chuba Chub to sign his new contract by offering him the dreaded shirt, do a bit of a cabinet shuffle & promote Wellbez to número nine or go all out & splurge a mill or 2 on Cavani or some unknown Patagonian alleged to be the the next Messi !!!!

 

Our future 9?

Our future 9?

Arsene the curse is yours.

 

Blimey, with all that going on , it’s amazing I got time to relax. It’s good to be back.

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3 Responses to And the Curse of the Arsenal Number 9 Continues…. The Far Side is Back

  1. Akersley January 29, 2015 at 1:35 pm #

    Retire the shirt number?

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